Fleur-de-Tasting

It was a crowded afternoon at Wegmans. Whew! We were done.

Richard guided my mom, navigating a walker these days, outside to our handicapped parking space, while I steered the shopping cart down the narrow checkout lane. I can almost hear my mother as she reads the sign above the car in her best deep Katherine Hepburn voice: “Reeeeserrrved Paaahhking”

“My God, this lane couldn’t get any narrower,” I mumbled to no one.

I removed a few packages from the upper basket and put them on the belt. Then I had to push through the entire lane, past the cashier, to get to the front of the cart, and try to squeeze it back in reverse. The woman with the next shopping cart helped me, while I put the divider between our purchases and unloaded the rest of my groceries.

The checkout clerk held up a plastic bag containing two pounds of white Belgian endive with pale yellow tips.

“What are these?”

“Endive. E-n-d-i-v-e,” I spelled out. “It’s Belgian.”

She scrolled through the register’s list of produce Eggplant Black, Eggplant Green, but no Endive. She kept going.

“There it is,” I said. It was listed as “Let French End”. “That’s it,” I told her.

“I’ve never seen …” the clerk said as she punched in the weight.

“Yes, and we took most of them.”

The woman with the cart behind me said, “I was just thinking, I’ve never seen such a variety of items.”

I laughed. “I got a new cookbook. Tasting Paris.”

Tasting ParisThere was:

Onion Red—for Quick Red Onion Pickle Oignon rouge en algre-doux, Page 19.

Marathon Bread—our weekly staple (a blend of oats, wheat, rye, fruits, vegetables, and every seed known to man) but three slices were destined for a bowl on the counter … to get stale … Making Your Own Bread Crumbs, Page 18.

Mussels Org 2lb and Herb Corriander (misspelled and actually flat-leaved parsley)—for Gratinéed Mussels with Garlic and Parsley Moules gratinées à l’ail et au persil, Pages 168-169.

Let French End—for French Endive Casserole Gratin d’endives, Pages 226-227. Oh, I miss Marina. I remember her Au Pair Grandmother making this dish for us at Christmas.

Weg Org Turkey Bac–Variations, Page 227, Endives au jambon. Turkey bacon is our go-to substitute for ham while Richard is in the household

Lemons—for Lemon Spatchcocked Chicken Poulet en crapaudine au citron, Pages 196-197.

O Mas Yung Chng Nd, WB 3-PK Cuke, WB Org Spring Mix, WB 6PK Red Pepper, Org Bl Brst Fp—Chinese noodles, cucumbers, greens, red peppers, and chicken for Richard’s favorite birthday meal, Peanut Butter Chinese Chicken. Fooled you, not from Tasting Paris

Clotilde Dusoulier, author of Tasting Paris, writes a blog named Chocolate & Zucchini, which arrives in my Inbox each month. Through her writing, I consider her a friend even though I don’t have a clue how to pronounce her name and I’ve never met her.

Her first cookbook, Chocolate & Zucchini, spent hours propped up on the windowsill next to the old iMac computer in the living room of our farmhouse at 440 Hottenstein. There, I had a view of the henhouse and the Fleur-de-Lys Farm shop entrance while I typed my first newsletters. Chocolate & Zucchini was an inspiration and gift from daughter Marina soon after she went to Belgium as an au pair in 2008 and never really returned.

Today Clotilde lives an exciting, food-filled life in Paris, with husband Maxence and sons Milan and Mika. And I’m about to begin a cooking adventure week, tasting Paris in State College, PA. Laurie Lynch

True Confessions: When I placed the order for Tasting Paris on Amazon, I intended to buy it for Marina. The book came out March 20. I bought it a week earlier, sight unseen, First-Day Ship Out. It was due to arrive in the State College post office on Wednesday. The impending fourth nor’easter of March gave me worries, but, alas, no delay.

I opened the box, took the book out of its plastic wrapper and put it under my bed. Thursday, I opened it and carefully looked at a few pages. Thursday night, well, why would Marina want Tasting Paris, I asked myself. She is tasting Ghent … and busy remodeling a townhouse. I might as well read it, then stick it in my suitcase and give it to her next time I visit. Yesterday, I decided maybe I should buy a second copy.

Grocery Goof: With all of my Tasting Paris shopping I forgot the cream cheese, or “Philadelphia” as they say in Paris, for Richard’s Italian Cream birthday cake. Today is the eve of his birthday and I have to make a quick run to the store. But when will I have the time?

Fleur-de-StinkbugPoetry

Clearly I am thinking way too much about stinkbugs. I wrote a poem about them this morning…Karen O’Mara Voytas, Guest Contributor
A CALL TO ARMS
Piling up five inches deep, ‘cross my windowsill they creep
Changing sheets I’m finding thirty, even tho I’m not that dirty
Move a picture, here are forty, pungent, taupe and kinda warty
Whether you have blue or pink rugs, chances are they’re full of stink bugs
Whack one on your neck while sleeping and you’ll wake up truly reeking.
Miracles of adaptation, they receive no adulation
Olfactory defenses, though not unknown, are not welcome in one’s home
Frustrating, odious, and repulsive, they’ve got us feeling quite convulsive
Their agricultural destruction threatens farmers’ mass production
To a pesticide injection, they respond with resurrection
And though wondrous to biology, they do a job on our psychology.
We lack an appreciation for their admirable adaptation
Classified downright ochraceous, diapausal and testaceous
Thigmotaxis brings them running, thermophilia keeps them sunning
Packing pheromones for aggregation, they use our homes for winter vacation
Like Cantonese, and me, polyphagous, they’ll eat stuff that’s quite ridiculous
And while we are on the topic, they’re negatively geotropic
Mutations so advantageous only render us pugnacious  
Who cares if they’re marmorated, they inspire only hatred.
In forty-three of the contiguous, almost every state’s pestiferous
Great America can’t cave in to an odorous invasion
Tho we’re near stink bug ground zero, we’re unrescued by a hero
In the absence of a natural predator, we cry out for an insect editor
We have seen the enemy and he is stinking: here’s an idea, if you’re thinking
If impeachment is impending, do some military spending
Show us that you are unbending, forge a legacy unending
If you want us not to hate ya, Trump, and trade wars do not faze ya
Send the stink bugs back to Asia.

Fleur-de-Stinkbug

A former co-worker of mine hit the big time. Karen Bernhard is mentioned in the March 12, 2018, issue of The New Yorker as the first U.S. entomologist to come into contact with the Asian brown marmorated stinkbug (Halyomorpha halys) in the Western Hemisphere.

In 1998 an Allentown man collected a sample of the pest and brought it into our Lehigh County Cooperative Extension Office for identification. He delivered it to the right person. Karen loves to key out insects and solve mysteries of the six-legged kind…even if it takes years.

After making the discovery, Karen often endured my office rants about Asian brown marmorated stinkbugs and their propensity for moving into the nooks and crannies of our old Berks County farmhouse. My kids grew up calling them “dinosaur bugs” and flinching every time they banged against a glowing lampshade after dark. Our stinky vacuum cleaner worked overtime sucking up the rascals.

I must admit, when I moved to State College with my mom in 2011, a dinosaur bug crawled out of a moving carton and I got a warm-and-fuzzy, nostalgic feeling. I may be the only person on the planet to react to the critter in that way.

This past week, a Kutztown friend sent a link to Karen Schultz’s article, When Twenty-Six Thousand Stinkbugs Invade Your Home. I think you will find it as fascinating as I did. Laurie Lynch

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2018/03/12/when-twenty-six-thousand-stinkbugs-invade-your-home